I struggle with negative self talk, too. One simple step I learned is just to recognize it, and name it. Once I do that, I can usually find a way to stop and not let it snowball. If I’m drunk or high though, I usually struggle to not let it get out of control… Once you recognize it, say, “I will not speak badly of myself.” or “I love myself” or “I am a good person”. Even if it doesn’t feel true at the moment, the words usually help me. Personally, I also found my way back to Catholic prayer tradition, so sometimes when it’s really bad, I’ll say a Hail Mary and usually find peace pretty soon.
I don’t know how to break the habit though. Maybe just practice.
Thank you for sharing, Hannah. I had an experience over the holiday where I literally the spent whole night thinking and sitting in the dread of self hate, and I didn’t even know that’s what I was doing until your post helped me see.